What's In It For Me?

Sermon "What's In It For Me?" 

Luke 16:19-31  

After 30 years of preaching ineffective Stewardship Sermons, I've decided to try something different. 

Disclaimer: Steve and the Generosity Committee can disavow all knowledge. 

I came up with this new plan all by myself. 

 

Now, I know that in Luke 6:35, Jesus tells us to "give, expecting nothing in return."  

But, dear Lord, 2000 years have passed.  

Everyone wants more bang for their buck. 

I see how universities do it. 

So why shouldn't the church get a piece of the action?  

Gird up your loins.  

It's kickoff time. 

Here's Pledge Perks 2026. 

 

First: Bronze Level 

Bronze Level pledgers, you'll get a Trinity T-shirt and commemorative mug.  

You'll also be invited to an exclusive "meet and greet" with the pastors in the Parlor, where we'll autograph your bulletin and pose for awkward selfies.  

Plus, you'll receive a DVD of: The Funniest Children's Sermon Moments, Volume One – The Preacher Fumbles.  

 

Next: Silver Level 

All the Bronze perks, plus a preferred parking pass.  

A member of the Youth Group will chauffeur you from your car to your pew in a golf cart.  

No speed limits apply.  

Helmets optional.  

 

Gold Level 

All the previous perks, plus a Bible personally signed by Jesus himself, as far as you know.  

Then, every morning, Danny Lyons will appear outside your bedroom window to wake you with his newest composition: "21 Air Horn Reville." 

If you live outside city limits, Danny will arrive by drone. 

 

Next: Platinum Level 

Each Sunday, you'll enjoy worship from your personalized La-Z-Boy recliner in the back row.  

Fully motorized, cupholders, and USB charging ports.  

Ushers will bring nachos and sodas directly to your seat and gently wake you in time for the Benediction.  

 

Diamond Level 

On Easter, we'll dress you in a white robe, lift you with wires and swing you around the sanctuary while you scream for Jesus to save you. 

 

Frequently Asked Questions about Pledge Perks 

Q: Do I have to share my La-Z-Boy recliner? 

 A: Yes, but only with the Holy Spirit. And possibly with Custodian Robert if you leave crumbs. 

Q: What if I don't want Danny Lyons outside my window every morning? 

 A: Too bad. Danny has already signed a lifelong contract. He has bells, air horns, and no sense of personal boundaries. 

Q: Can I trade my Platinum snack delivery for something healthier? 

 A: Absolutely. Instead of nachos and sodas, ushers will bring you celery sticks, kale chips, and a 64-oz bottle of room-temperature water. (But let's be honest: you'll regret it.) 

Q: Will the golf cart chauffeur also carry my coffee? 

 A: Of course. These youth are trained to hold your coffee, balance your Bible, and still drive full speed through the narthex. Safety goggles recommended. 

Q: Is there a level above Diamond? 

A: Yes. The Secret Galactic Titanium Infinity level. Benefits include naming rights for all children being baptized. Plus Hyunjoo will play your walk-in theme music every Sunday. Options include Eye of the Tiger or Baby Shark. 

 

So, to answer the question, "What do I get for my money?"  

The answer is: perks, privileges, possibly nachos.  

But more importantly, you get to be part of God's work here at Trinity.  

And if that's not worth at least a golf cart ride through the sanctuary, I don't know what is. 

 

From the bottom of my heart I share these ideas.  

You're welcome. 

 

 

Today's scripture – The Rich Man and Lazarus – takes the opposite approach.  

Instead of bling bags FOR giving, it's a warning about NOT giving. 

It's a Jewish folk tale about what happens if you DON'T share your money.  

Sadly, it involves eternal torment.  

Now, seriously, that's at least as far-fetched as tiered giving rewards.  

I think we all know that if you DO give generously, you won't get golf cart rides.  

And if you DON'T give generously, you won't burn in punishment.  

 

In God's economy, Jesus says to "give, expecting nothing in return."  

Or, conversely, don't give, and you'll still get Jesus's love in return.  

Because Jesus doesn't sell salvation.  

 

Giving isn't buying.  

And buying isn't giving.  

This is not a deal, and there is no art to it.  

Stewardship isn't about what WE get, whether it's many happy returns or an eternally bad one.  

Generosity's about amplifying your wealth by sharing it.  

In this case, it's about sharing it with your church.  

Because when we pool our resources, generously and thankfully, we multiply what we can do to bring the kingdom of God to earth, right here and right now. 

 

 

What you give in your pledge goes to the annual church operating budget.  

And, as you can see from the financial figures on the back of the bulletin, Trinity is running a deficit.  

This church is asking itself to give more. 

 

This building surely isn't as large as Bryant-Denny Stadium (and Saban field), or The Swamp, or Death Valley.  

But keeping the lights on, the HVAC system repaired and running isn't getting any less expensive.  

Neither are the insurance rates.  

Those aren't – as they say – sexy, but when the heat index is 105, it's pretty important.  

 

Trinity Learning Center, or TLC, depends on support from the church.  

Five days a week, you provide top-tier care for the children of working parents. 

 

Your pledge goes to pay salaries of a team of top-notch staff persons.  

A church of any size, especially one of this size, requires human infrastructure, people who work behind the scenes, often out of view, to keep information flowing, bills paid, and floors vacuumed and polished.  

You get not one, but two pastors, also vacuumed and polished. 

 

And then, there are the many, many ministries of this church.  

Your annual pledge supports Bible studies, Youth programs and retreats, Sunday School for all ages, low-impact aerobics, and even pickleball. 

 

Look outside the walls to the community ministries Trinity supports and performs.  

Mission work in Africa.  

Food ministries.  

Housing assistance.  

Summer Camp, college ministry, Hospital visits, Prayer cards, dinner groups, just to name a few. 

 

And then, this magnificent music program.  

Even though our choir members volunteer their time, we support scholarships, purchase music (which ain't cheap), keep the pipe organ piping, the bells ringing, and provide five-star leaders like Craig, Hyunjoo, and Danny to coach our singers and instrumentalists to ever higher levels of excellence. 

 

 

So, no. If you can give, if you can increase your pledge, you won't get preferred parking or recliners and nachos in the back.  

 

Although, you might want to consider it. Just saying. 

 

Even Jesus depended on benefactors like Mary and Martha.  

Even Paul needed support from congregations near and far.  

And what did those givers get in return? 

They got churches.  

They got ministries.  

They got the satisfaction of knowing they were making God's work on earth a reality.  

 

Same here at Trinity.  

Unlike the rich man in the purple robes, you don't have to fear eternal punishment.  

But like Lazarus, you gain the amplified and growing presence of the nearness of the Holy Spirit.  

Like Lazarus, you get healing of body and soul.  

You'll know that you and the people seated near you, together, are serving to each other – and to a hungry world – serving the body of Christ come alive. 

-- 

I'm sinfully proud – and lucky – to get to serve Trinity Presbyterian Church (USA) for just a little while.  

I'm blessed to be able to help you get ready for your next called and installed Senior pastor.  

I want this church to be ready – in its programs, in its personnel, and yes, in its budget as you prepare for your next senior pastor. 

 

These days – and probably all the days – people are really concerned about what we're getting for our money.  

We ask, "What do I get for this?"  

"What's in it for me?" 

 

From the earliest days, church people have been gathering together to listen, to love, and to share their gifts with each other.  

By their efforts, and by the blessing of the Holy Spirit – it works. 

 

What do we get for giving money, time, talents?  

SOME things we can see.  

Like a beautiful and functional place to worship and learn.  

SOME things we can hear.  

Like messages of hope and love.  

Like the wisdom of people who aren't exactly like us, but are still searching.  

But there are a lot of things in a church you can't see, things can't even hear.  

Like the things you feel, feel in your heart, feel in your spirit.  

Whether or not you can put a name on it. 

 

Universities and other non-profits have tiers of giving.  

But here, we're all equal.  

No matter how much or how little we can share. 

We're all here for one thing, the same thing:  

The presence, the love, the hope that comes from Jesus.  

And that's something no one can put a price on. 

[eos]